Michael: You can’t quit! On the first day. Tony: I was on the fence about this and… it’s just not a good fit. Tony: It’s just not going to work for me. I’m under this… I’m under this hock here. Michael: Don’t be shy! Dwight! Let’s do this! Just use the momentum of your lower half to hoist yourself up. Tony! Please join your cohorts on the table if you would. Michael: Why are the new people on the table? To show them that we are not above them. Michael: All right, all right, I’m on a roll.
Michael: Okay, I told you these guys had a sense of humor. Michael: You me? You me? Me you me! You! You! You me you! You! Oh my nose so itchy, why’s my nose so itchy!Īndy: Oh, probably because of all the nose candy. Michael: You me? You me? Me you? You! You! You me! Bow Bow Bow! Dwight! Just.Īndy: Īndy & Michael: Don’t hurt me! Baby, don’t hurt me!Īndy & Michael: Whoa-oh-oh-oh! Whoa-oh-oh… There’s supposed to be music and it’s… I got it, I got it! I got it. ‘Wow! What a day! Feels more like a night at a party than a day at work.’ Well, in my opinion, business should feel like a night out. Michael: I know what a lot of you must be thinking. So let’s just all laugh together and watch “Lazy Scranton”. And what we’re all about here in Scranton. It’s got a little bit of a zing to it and I hope that it gives you a flavor of what we’re all about here at Dunder Mifflin. But it’s not like any orientation video that any of you have ever seen. So I have made an orientation video especially for you newcomers. Moving to a new job can be very stressful. All of your questions are about to be answered. Toby, this is an orientation not a borientation.
Toby: Um… You might want these orientation materials. Michael: No, it’s not beef… just… sit down, please. Michael: Well, then… consider it poisoned beef.
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